Comedians and other performers,Boycott Comedy Clubs that employ pay to play and bringer shows.
Once again (this time as a discussion topic on the Humorous Speakers’ Bureau via “Linkedin”, we hear and read the sad refrain about comedy club owners and managers who require budding comics to pay for stage time and bring five to ten friends to the club in order to get a few minutes on stage. Even my local (Columbus, Ohio) “Funny Bone” Comedy Club expects each open mic humorists to pay a $5.00 cover and bring a minimum of five friends who also have to pay a $5.00 cover as well as order drinks ($3.00 for half a can of soda) and food (if you want to call that food). That’s about $100 for 5 minutes of stage time ($20.00 per minute or $1,200.00 per hour)? Do they really think we believe their rent is actually $43,830.00 ($1,200.00 per hour multiplied by 24 hours in a day multiplied by 365.25 days in a year divided by 12) per month? And, even if their rent were really that unbelievable amount, do they seriously expect beginning comedians and their friends to foot the entire bill?
What do I do about the pay to play/bringer policy at my local Funny Bone Comedy Club? I don’t perform at the Columbus Funny Bone Comedy Club. I honestly don’t believe any of my body parts will fall off if I never perform stand-up comedy at the local Funny Bone Comedy Club (So far, so good). I’m sure there are many successful comedians who once never paid to perform their comedy act at a Funny Bone comedy Club or any other pay to pay comedy club or bringer show comedy club. I, personally, would much rather work out my new comedy material at a retirement center where I can get 30-45 minutes and I don’t have to pimp out my friends, and sometimes I can even get paid.
I have one question for all of you who are complaining (and rightfully so) about the unfair policies of these comedy clubs. What are you going to do about it? ”What can we do about it?” I hear you asking. Well, if you’re too young to remember the fifties and sixties (and most of you are), ask your parents or grandparents about the anti-war protests, boycotts, “sit-ins” and the civil rights marches. I’m guessing some of your parents and grandparents even took part in these historic, world changing events. What about the bus boycott (Ever heard of Rosa Parks?) in Montgomery, Alabama in 1957? The owners of the bus company were forced to end their racist “blacks in the back of the bus” policy or face bankruptcy. This was a peaceful demonstration that brought about real, permanent change.
Every year we observe Martin Luther King, Jr.’s Birthday by not going to work. Why don’t we honor his spirit by actually doing something? By standing up to injustice and saying, “Hell no! We won’t take it any more!” Why don’t we all band together? Let’s start by boycotting all of those comedy clubs that have “pay to play” and “bringer show” policies. And let’s tell all of our friends, relatives, and fellow entertainers to boycott them, as well. In the words of Nelson Mandela, “Agitate, old lions!”
Then, save up all of your pay to play money for a month or so, pool your resources and rent a hall at a local fraternal lodge (Elks, Moose, Eagles, American Legion, etc.), or a small, modestly priced, local theater. I know some of you have theater experience from your high school or college days. It’s time you put it to work again. If you’re not too proud to set up chairs and clean up afterward, you could even earn some money instead of paying money to comedy club owners or managers. Charge a small admission fee such as $5.00 and split the profits. Each comedian will get more than five minutes on stage and, quite possibly, make a few dollars on the deal. If the comedy club owners and managers don’t see the error of their way, keep renting out your own entertainment venues and staging your own shows. You’ll probably come to realize you didn’t need those comedy clubs, after all. And those comedy club owners and managers will realize they need you more than you need them. I’m certain Martin Luther King, Jr. and Rosa Parks will be looking down and smiling.
I already boycott comedy clubs who use these policies. Beginning in the new year, I will be renting entertainment venues and staging my own shows. If anyone in Central Ohio (or anywhere else) wants to join me, you can contact me via my web site.
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Recording and Distributing Comedy and Other Entertainment A la DYI
The following two paragraphs are from a contribution by Roger Blazic to a Linkedin Group called, “Comedy Depreciation” Hosted by the very talented comedic writer and performer Frannie Sheridan. Thank you, Roger and Frannie.
“Comedian Louis Szekely, better known as Louis C.K., is profiting handsomely from a $5 video of his latest standup routine, which he produced and distributed himself.
Instead of partnering with a studio, C.K. hired a team with six cameras to tape two of his performances at the Beacon Theater in Manhattan. He distributed the video through a website specially built for that purpose. Within 12 hours of going on sale Saturday, 50,000 people purchased the video, covering all of costs incurred for its production (around $170,000) and creation of the website ($32,000). By day four, he had sold 110,000 copies, making an additional $200,000 off the venture.”
Well readers, both of you? Does this spark any ideas among my fellow entertainers and speakers? It certainly does with me. You can do this, too. Perhaps, not on the same scale, but it needn’t be on the same scale. If you can make a little money and get your name out there, why not give it a shot?
Whether you’re a comedy artist like Louis C.K., a singer (with a band, or a soloist), a dancer, a motivational speaker, or whatever type of performer you are. Don’t just sit there waiting for something to happen or for some agent to discover you!! They don’t have time for that, anymore. Before you’re next gig (What’s that I hear some of you say? You don’t have any upcoming gigs? Stage your own. Rent a small, local theater. If your local theaters are budget breakers, rent a hall at your friendly, neighborhood American Legion, AmVets, Elks, Moose, etc. and sell tickets) , contact a nearby (near where you live or near where your performing venue) college and hire a student (their rates are reasonable because they always need money for tuition, books, tattoos, body piercing, and gourmet/designer coffee) to record your show and prepare it for online distribution and back of room sales.
As for marketing, get some fliers printed up and put them on car windshields at large stores and malls. Don’t bother hanging them in store windows because, since cell phones became the “Swiss Army Knives” of communication and entertainment, nobody looks up while their walking down the street anymore. Mention your upcoming performance on your web site (repeatedly). Tell your friends, Tell your relatives, Tell your co-workers (if you’re transitioning from a day job). Tell other entertainers in your area. Tell strangers on the street. Take out an ad in your local penny saver newspaper.
I will be doing this, on the smaller scale, in 2012. I will be renting entertainment venues around central Ohio (Columbus and surrounding cities) and recording my performances for online distribution and for back of room sales at future events. It will be a brand new, original, comedy variety show featuring: stand-up comedy, comedy magic, prop comedy, physical comedy, humorous song parodies (with guitar), impressions comedy storytelling, and comedic voices.
Read MoreThe Many Challenges of Being a Stage Entertainer
In my next few blog posts, I will be dealing with the many challenges of pursuing a career in the live entertainment business. During my twenty-five years as a stage performer (clown, comedy magician, comedy sketch writer, comedy balloon twister, physical comedian, sketch comedian, physical and verbal improvisation artist, stand-up comedian, comedy song lyricist, prop comedian, vaudeville style variety comedian, and comedic storyteller), I have faced numerous challenges. From faulty sound systems and bad acoustics to double dipping, slow paying agents to clients who write bad checks or cancel your performance at the last minute (or try to get out of paying all together, I have seen it all (or at least, most of it).
The most annoying challenge (and the one which occurs most often and seems to be getting worse every year) is the rude audience or the inconsiderate audience member. I’m not talking about hecklers. While I have been blessed to encounter very few of them over the years, I have been able to deal with them very quickly and effectively. I am referring to people who, apparently, have never been taught the consideration required to simply sit quietly and allow the entertainer to complete his or her presentation. This problem predates cell phone and even pagers. The main culprit, along with a few rude, entitled people, appears to the DVD player and it’s predecessor, the VCR (video cassette recorder). The convenience of these devices – - – The fact that one can stop and re-start the pre-recorded entertainment at will – - has left some people with the impression that they are now in charge of every performance, even the live ones, which they attend or view. And therefore, they can interrupt a live an actor or presenter whenever they feel like doing so.
Whether you’re a musician, a comic, a singer, a magician, an actor, or a storyteller, I’m sure you can appreciate the fact that any noise or disruption can play havoc with your timing and make your performance much more difficult. From kibitzing women to good old boys carrying on conversations to parents who bring crying babies to shows to people using cell phones there appears to be no end to those who will unwittingly or, even intentionally disrupt your performance.
Once while my son, Brian and I were performing a comedy sketch at an Eagles Lodge, a woman walked up to the microphone and announced, “There’s about twenty-five hot dogs left if anybody wants one.” In the middle of the very next sketch, another woman approached the microphone and declared, “I lost an elephant lapel pin. If you find it, please bring it to me.” You can understand why I now use a lapel mic or and headset. A microphone attached to a the traditional, free-standing mic stand is, apparently, too much temptation for certain audience members.
Recently, while performing his one-man show on Broadway, Billy Crystal had to deal with an audience member talking on a cell phone in the middle of a critical scene. It’s bad enough that we actually have to remind people to turn off their cell phones (I would include “pagers” but I honestly can’t remember the last time I saw one) before we begin a performance. I recently attended a comedy concert where the opening act had to ask several audience members to curtail their conversations so the rest of the audience could hear her presentation.
My plea to audience members is this: Stage entertainers spend literally hundreds of hours writing and rehearsing material which may take only a few minutes to present on stage. Please respect their efforts and the right of the audience to hear them.
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She who laughs last – - Is, apparently the deepest
As I have mentioned before, I belong to several Linkedin discussion groups which cater to live stage entertainers. Some of these groups deal specifically with comedic performers (comics, ventriloquists, comedy magicians, physical comedians, pantomime artists, comedy jugglers, comedy writers, sketch comedians, etc.) while others are open to members of the entertainment community at large.
The question of the week, from a group for stand-up comedians and humorous speakers, is whether men or women are a better comedy audience. I would have to say, it really depends on two rather obvious variables: The particular genre of the comedy material and how it is presented.
In both my personal and professional experience, it’s easier to get men to laugh. Men respond more easily to hack jokes and sight gags (remember, men are more prone to react to visual stimulation). As a comedy variety artist who has been married twice (each time to a different woman), I have observed that women, having a more sophisticated comedy palate, will barely roll their eyes at the aforementioned light effort type of comedy that seems to elicit belly laughs and knee slaps from their male counterparts. They will, however, laugh harder and longer at the more deep structure type of comedy (relationship scenarios, storytelling with a decent plot and well developed characters, etc.). One might say that women respond to comedy in much the same way they respond to sex. It may take some time and effort to get women going. But, once you do, they will laugh much, much longer and much, much harder than men.
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Free Agency – - The Art of Creating Your Own Performance and Recording Opportunities
Greetings! My talented colleagues in the live entertainment business: during this week’s blog posts, I have offered two alternatives to paying comedy (and music, poetry, etc.) clubs for stage time (and pimping out your friends to pack the house for the club owner/managers) and/or waiting for bookers (for cruise ships, night clubs, lounges, hotels, casinos, etc.) to respond to your promotional packet and, maybe, give you an opportunity to perform and earn some money. So far, I have suggested 1) Performing at retirement centers (for free or for a small fee) in order to get plenty of stage time (to work on your material and timing), and 2) Getting together with other entertainers and offering to perform comedy showcases or variety shows for restaurants, bars, etc. on their slow nights.
Today, I have a third alternative to share with you. I call this option “Free agency.” This option involves working together with your fellow performers (stand-up comedians, jugglers, Illusionists, stage hypnotists, mimes, comedy magicians, ventriloquists, singers, musicians, pantomime artists, etc.) to rent out venues and produce your own live, stage shows. A lot of fraternal/service organizations have halls which are available for rent, often at a reasonable rate. The halls have decent acoustics (they’re often rented by country and rock bands). If the lodge has a bar and the organization is willing to help advertise the show, you will probably get some of the lodge “regulars” to attend the performance. If the lodge has a kitchen and a ladies’ auxiliary (forgive my sexism), you may also be able to offer dinner and a show to your audience and share the proceeds with the lodge.
You and your fellow entertainers will need to be willing to share expenses (hall rental, advertising), setting up (chairs, tables, etc.) and putting away down chores, and the proceeds. As I mentioned in yesterdays blog post, you can also take turns being the opening act, master of ceremonies, middle act, and feature act. You could also rotate set-up and tear down assignments. This way, the same people aren’t always lumbered with the most difficult and most boring grunt work.
Once you and your friends have made some money, you can rent an actual theater and record a live performance. Then you will have a CD or DVD to sell at future performances and on your respective web sites.
I will be implementing this plan in the Columbus, Ohio area along with several performers I have met through meetup.org. Anyone else who would like to join us, please contact me by telephone at 614-891-7393 or send me an email via this web site.
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Entertainers: You Can Accept the Comedy Club/Booking Agent Status Quo – - – Or Create Your Own Destiny
Attention: comedians, musicians, ventriloquists, comedy magicians, variety performers, mimes, stage hypnotists, singers, jugglers, pantomime artists, and all other stage entertainers! Are you tired of submitting you promo package (demo, pictures, one sheet, references, etc.) to countless entertainment bookers and never hearing back. And when you call to follow up, are they always “in a meeting? Have you had enough of the “open mic” (stand-up comedy, poetry, music, sketch comedy, etc.) scene? Are you sick and tired of paying five to ten dollars for every three to five minutes of stage time the club owners/managers see fit to dole out to you? Have you worn out or alienated all of your friends because the “open mic” clubs won’t let you onstage unless you bring at least five paying customers every time you pay to perform? If any of all of this sounds familiar, then, perhaps you would be willing to consider an alternative.
No, I am not selling anything. I’m not plugging any book, CD, DVD, or other source of wisdom guaranteed to make you rich and famous. What I would like to do is offer some free (my favorite four letter word) advice to anyone out there who is as fed up with the status quo re: booking agents, club owners, etc. Take a look back in history. What did our great grand parents do when they were finally fed up with the working conditions in the sweat shop factories, coal mines, and other work places of their time period? First, they organized. Then they seized control of the means of production. You can do the same. Please understand, I am not advocating strikes and boycotts (although they, too can be effective). What I am suggesting (and will also be doing) is that you take control of your means of production (your collective talents) and offer them to those who would appreciate and respect your abilities. Start by assembling enough entertainers of differing skills to put on your own variety shows. Stop thinking of other stage performers as competitors whom you should avoid at all costs. They are your colleagues in the entertainment business. You can help each other succeed.
Once you and your fellow entertainers are organized, start approaching local restaurants, bars, etc. and offering to present a comedy showcase or variety show on a night that is usually slow for that particular restaurants or bar. Why not try and negotiate a small fee or free (there’s that word, again) food and drinks for you and your talented colleagues? It doesn’t cost anything to ask, and you’d be surprised what some restaurant/bar owners or managers will give if you can attract a crowd on a slow night. You can all take turns be the opening act, the master of ceremonies, the feature act, etc. This will enhance each person’s performing experience and you just might make some good friends along the way. Some of you may even decide to perform onstage as a team. Successful comic actor Fred Willard (Everybody Loves Raymond, Back to You, Fernwood Tonight, America Tonight, Rosanne) started out as part of a four person sketch comedy troupe which was known as the Ace Trucking Company.
Tomorrow, I will offer yet another alternative to the so-called “tried and true” methods of booking performances.
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